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Everyday stuff America sucks on (compared to all others)



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Americans remain too open to use bidets

According to the teachings of Canadian Americanologist Chad Kroeger, the real American dream is to build a brand new house for an episode of Cribs and a bathroom where you can play baseball. Despite all the space available in these cavernous cleaning halls, Americans are still very anal when it comes to not installing bidets.

Bidets have been used by cultures for centuries. Who doesn't like the idea of ​​digging into your recently polluted butt only with the sheer promise of a cartoon teddy bear that keeps your hand from being streaked by your own sewage . But English-speaking countries have always disliked everything French, and besides putting an ashtray on someone's back during a threesome, bidets are as decadent French as possible. A reputation that was only strengthened during World War II when American GIs encountered these slide cleaners in French brothels, which combined immorality with the innocent gift of feeling cleaned of the trumpeting cherub on a Roman fountain.

  The level of French hygiene. Wikimedia Commons / Turpin Catherine The level of French hygiene.

As a result, Americans are still tearing through toilet paper at a rate of 36.5 billion rolls or 1

5 million trees a year, a dependency. That shouldn't have happened if his pilgrim puritanism hadn't despised detergents that were for colons and that Climate is much more copacetic than the wet wipes that lie about biodegradability. It took a global epidemic and a thousand memes of toilet paper shortages before the Americans even thought about crouching over bidets, rather than continuing to expect them to move straight to the three-shell system like a bunch of stallones of padded paper. [19659009] 6

Who the hell is still using the imperial system?

The United States is proud to be a young nation, a fresh start, a melting pot that shuns old ways of life for bold new worlds. So, of the sparse things that your English masters can hold on to, why did one of them have to be the imperial system?

What a cruel absurd place would force a child to learn a system in which a fluid ounce contains 240 or a yard is the length of one hundred and eight barley grains? Myanmar. Liberia. The United States of America. And that’s it.

The United States is one of three or three remaining remnants in the world that stubbornly maintains a system of scientific measurements based on the assumptions of a 12th-century syphilitic English king. For a brief enlightened moment, the American government used the Metric Conversion Act of 1975 to remove the straps of its old-time suppressors wearing wigs. However, since the switch was voluntary and not government ordered, the United States Metric Board was unable to force ample conversion converters and the idea was abandoned in 1982, the American public was unwilling to restructure everyday society and, knowing itself, to mass slaughter by changing all speed signs from 55 to 90.


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