When you hear that the founder of Aunt Annes Pretzels wrote a treatise in 2008 Twist of FaithHer instinct was likely to just roll her eyes there, but it turned out to be a life worth remembering. Anne Beiler grew up as much as possible from the culture of the malls where her shops thrive: in the Amish community. Yes, there is a real Anne, and with 30 nieces and nephews, she is not only an aunt, but also a participant in what could be called an “extreme aunt”.
In the Amish tradition, she dropped out of school in eighth grade, married at 18 …
… and shortly afterwards started taking out tiny little buckle heads. She was well on her way to becoming the traditional Amish wife and motherhood until one of her young daughters died in a tractor accident, which – if consolation can be found in such a situation – is at least an extremely Amish journey.
Because people in some religious communities don’t even change their underwear without consulting their church leader, Beiler sought help with their grief from their pastor … who raped her and manipulated her into a six-year sexual relationship. When Beiler finally broke her silence, she blew the lid off a glass of theological deception that was much fuller than she had ever suspected. It turned out that the pastor had basically done the same to every woman she knew, including all of her sisters. Together they ran him out of the city on a railroad, which you can probably still do in the Amish country.
That is why she bought her first pretzel shop in 1988. Her husband wanted to open a counseling center where women could seek free help that was not guaranteed to result in sexual torture, but the Amish are not known for their enormous wealth, so they bought a local brecca shop that happened to be at a high discount on the market came to fund the company. Sure, she had no idea how to make pretzels, but she was so committed to learning the art of pretzel making (and, as you know, business) that the dropout was eight years old from different locations within a year Aunt Anne’s pretzels. She would fund this women’s counseling, damn it, even if it meant succumbing to the evils of electricity.
Do not worry; none of them dampened their belief in the slightest. In fact, she was recently on the board of the Museum of the Bible with this hobby lobby man who stole all of these artifacts. She doesn’t seem to be directly connected to this incident, but doesn’t sleep on it. This is a ruthless bitch who saw some shit and we would all be so happy to have her as our creepy Jesus aunt.
Top picture: Aunt Anne