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10 beautiful places in the world (which actually suck somehow)

Our world is full of amazing places. Seriously, get out of your door, start walking in any direction, and chances are you'll probably find something interesting in a few hours. It could be a meadow, a groovy road you've never visited before, a windy coastline, or even a noodle bar that offers everything you can eat, with free drinks for every unshaven customer. Hey, amazing is a relative concept.

The problem is that most of us do not do our own research. We comb travel guides or the Internet for places that appear in the top 10 must-see lists, and then we go where the others are. And while some of these places are truly amazing (take a bow, Taj Mahal, Machu Picchu and the Grand Canyon), some actually suck in much more than you would normally expect. In the mood for a distorted, wildly unscientific look at the most overrated beauties in the world? You are in the right place …

0. Dresden, Germany, is soulless ugly

Dresden's nickname is "Florence on the Elbe". That's a tremendous claim to fame, and it's absolutely not exaggerated … assuming you've just spotted this article on a crashed time machine and read it before February 13, 1945. That was the night the Allied aircraft [19659005] fired the ancient city and turned this architectural treasure into the urban equivalent of the charred lumps found at the bottom of a hearth. So, why do people still worship Dresden as beautiful? This is probably due to the fact that they have seen pictures of her after partial reconstruction in 2005. The keyword there is "partial". Apart from a tiny fraction, which was rebuilt in the middle, the largest part of Dresden is now soulless concrete blocks of flats

Those responsible for the reconstruction of Dresden after the war were not West Germans who wanted to rebuild their ruined country. They were East German Communists who wanted to show the endless possibilities of the Soviet Concrete. When Kurt Vonnegut, who survived the Dresden fire bombing as a prisoner of war, visited the city after reconstruction, he claimed it looked "very much like Dayton, Ohio." Nothing against the inhabitants of Dayton, but literally no one in the history of The World has looked at the sixth largest city in Ohio and said: "That reminds me of Florence."

. 9 Dublin, Ireland, is the Monopoly

The capital of Ireland, Dublin, is number one for millions of Americans who proudly pursue their family history and / or try to get drunk on Guinness. It is a city that is beautiful, historic, literary and small enough to handle, unlike the British colossus London. Sounds good until you accidentally inquire about the prices. At this point you will cry over your empty wallet while all your hard-earned cash evaporates in a haze of whiskey steam.

Dublin is an expensive city. Yes, even if you are used to NYC or London. Even if you are used to Singapore. Dublin is the second most expensive city for expats in the entire Eurozone, beaten only by Paris. But Paris does not pretend to be anything but classic and highly priceless. Dublin advertises as your friend, as the jovial Irishman with whom you want to share a drink. Only after that you realize that he has taken the purse in your mouth, and probably with your pants. Even tourism experts have described the city as a "rip-off" 8. Iceland is drowning among tourists

The total population of Iceland is only 334,252, about the size of Santa Ana, California. The number of annual tourists to Iceland is over 2 million, or about as much as the population of Houston. Imagine Houston's entire citizenship spending three hours in the summer swarming through the streets of Santa Ana, taking selfies, clogging traffic, and generally behaving like Americans on vacation (ie, like Jerkwads) ). Everything disappeared under a sea of ​​ten gallons of hats and Texan attitudes to weapon security. Well, that's basically the permanent state in which Iceland lives .

There is no doubt that Iceland is a beautiful country, with rugged, awesome views and secluded road stretches that can feel like another planet. The only problem is that these remote roads and jagged vistas are now full of Americans, British, Canadians and Germans clutching selfie sticks and talking about the fact that there are far too many tourists in Iceland these days. Oh, and they're probably too drunk and acting in a way that's guaranteed to upset the locals. Thanks to drunken tourists, Iceland now has a big problem with people who puke in public areas . Do you really want to add to these gross stats?

. 7 Varanasi, India, where the Ganges turn into toxic mud

Varanasi is the spiritual home of Hinduism, a place where enlightenment blends with stunning architecture to create something unique. The centerpiece is the mighty Ganges that flows through the city, washing away sin with its mighty waters. At least that was the case earlier. Today, the Ganges is less a river than a wave of mud that is so poisonous that it either gives you superpowers or just kills you.

Factories, sewer pipes, private bathrooms and tanneries upstream Garbage dump their waste in the Ganges as it makes its way through India. Elsewhere, the water is spun off for industrial purposes, meaning that what is left is unable to maintain a healthy flow. The result is a river of mud that is getting muddy and muddy as it winds its way towards Varanasi. When it reaches the city, it can not really be called a river anymore. It is more of a chemical exchange that has decided to do walkabouts. This is a doubly important issue as one of the main reasons for visiting Varanasi is bathing in the river (seriously, do not really). There is clean-up going on but they are behind schedule, over budget and, frankly, not very effective.

. 6 Stonehenge, UK, is just off a busy road

Imagine being in Stonehenge during Solstice. The eerie silence just before the sun rises between the perfectly aligned rocks would be magical. Or at least that's what it would be like if that weird silence were not interrupted by the sound of car horns, roaring engines, and stuck drivers yelling at each other. Yep, though it's an ancient wonder, supposedly in the middle of nowhere, Stonehenge is in fact near a road . And what street. Known as the A303, it is the main connection between London and the counties of Devon and Cornwall. This is the same Devon and Cornwall that Londoners visit every weekend and every holiday.

Believe it or not, that's an improvement. Prior to 2013, an equally populated road was only a few meters from Stonehenge itself which meant that one could view the secrets of the universe while spoiled children roared behind the windows and threw things at them. But even the newly derived road leaves the monument with a constant traffic noise. The good news is that the British government is planning to build a tunnel. The bad news is that archaeologists say it will undermine Stonehenge's foundations.

. 5 Dracula's castle, Romania, is surrounded by a forest of sticky stables

Perhaps we require a bit that a place known as Dracula's Castle is free of shabby street stalls. But there is a common side of the road, and then there are the huge miles that plague Bran Castle in Romania, the source of Bram Stoker's inspiration for his novel. Presumably you have seen pictures of the castle, which lie in a forest of forests and look European and repellent. What these pictures do not show is the much larger sticky forest that surrounds the real ones.

The approach to Bran Castle is like approaching Disneyland … when Disneyland, with a budget of six dollars, was run by people who had given up their goofy costumes for vampire trinkets. There are stalls that sell vampire teeth. Shops sell vampire masks. Shops that sell things you would not need in a billion years, but still have vampires on them. There is even a theme park replica of the castle, in the immediate vicinity of the actual castle.

The worst part? Romania is full of beautiful castles of which no one has yet heard anything that you can all explore without you having any type that drives you to buy fake rubber clubs.

. 4 The Maldives are like putting themselves in a beautiful prison

These screensavers of pristine white beaches lapped by crystal-clear water, do you always see on your mother's old laptop? There are good chances that these are images of the Maldives, a tiny cluster of islands in the Indian Ocean that combined to form a very widely distributed state. Of course, the islands are as beautiful as these pictures suggest. But entering an island paradise is not as easy as the first flight to the capital, Male. Unless you are very wealthy or have made your research, your holiday in the Maldives could be very expensive or very claustrophobic.

There are more than 1,200 islands in the Maldives. The largest, Gan, is only 2.26 square kilometers in size. This means that each resort is its own private island, and not cheap between them. If you're not cool being caught by the same people day in and day out with nothing but the resort, you'll have to get rid of $ 650 for a 15-minute seaplane transfer to another island . That's just one possibility. It costs the same to come back and "getting back" could lead to an island resort that has nothing to do except drink. Great for not adventurous drunks. Hell for literally every other.

. 3 Bagan, Myanmar, is plagued by Ham-fisted Temple remnants

A collection of thousands of ancient temples that spread over an endless, undulating plain, Bagan in Myanmar looks like the kind of place you like would have to kill to visit. Certainly it is one of the most instagramable spots in Asia. But these fantastic photos, taken from afar and showing distant temples covered in fog, miss a very important piece of context. In the past many of these temples were not well maintained. They look today not because they are supposed to look like that, but because the previous military government summed them up again without any idea what they were doing.

Bagan's restoration work is bad. Not only "not great", but active bad . The temples were rebuilt with coarse, substandard cement and with normal bricks instead of faithful materials. While this is not always clear to the untrained eye, you can sometimes stumble over evidence of this shabby work as you walk around. The bottom line is a sort of Disney-fied version of Burmese history that is about as authentic as the It's a Small World ride. There is a reason why UNESCO listed Pyu in Myanmar, but refused to touch Bagan with a barge pole.

. 2 Germany's Romantic Road was invented by travel agencies

The Romantic Road. Even the name is evocative, conjuring up images of stately medieval towns, ancient castles and beautiful nature as you can shake a stick. The road that leads through Germany from Würzburg to Füssen in the Alps sounds like the definition of old-fashioned European romanticism. There is only one problem with that. It is not old. It's not even something the Victorians invented. It was invented by travel agencies in the 1950s, and you better believe it is so crowded with tourists, as it implies.

West Germany in the 1950s emerged from the shadow of World War II and needed all the money and non-Nazi publicity it could get. For example, a number of travel agents designed a theme route that would show their country at its best and give it a meaningful name. While many of the stops along the route are indeed beautiful to look at, some are seriously overestimated. Würzburg, for example, is as if someone had taken the best parts of Prague and made them smaller, but still the same number of tourists. Rothenburg Od The Tauber is like someone trying to see how many tour groups they could stuff into a room before everyone started killing each other in a Mad Max -like orgy of violence. Our advice? Leave the beaten track and try Nuremberg instead.

. 1 Disney World Florida is as magical as cholera

As a child, you probably dreamed of going there. Disney World in Orlando, Florida, is by far the largest Disney amusement park and the most aggressive one. All this proves the old adage that bigger is not necessarily better. Disney World has the worst rides, the vainest swaths, and the least charm of all parks in the Disney franchise

That may not be such a pain in itself, but it's also the most expensive. In a strange reversal of the logic that more money requires better quality, Disney World demands more of an experience that is much less fun than its sister parks in California, Paris, Shanghai or Tokyo. A major problem is that it is so dispersed that it is moving from one place to another to become a discouraging experience. There is also the question of how valuable each place is or not. While the park in Anaheim, California wastes no square foot of space, the Florida version provides a huge area for the Epcot Center. Nobody in their right mind wants to visit the Epcot Center on a voluntary basis. But, hey, if you're in the area anyway, you can just walk down the street and visit the superior Universal Studios. You are welcome.

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